If I laugh, I will die

So, lately I've been nothing but a whiny little thing on here. Last week, Maysen was watched by my father/step mother in law at Danielle's house (my step sister in law). Danielle has 3 kids who always seem to be sick. Welcome to public school. Well, anyway, Maysen was over there Monday and Wednesday. Monday Jurny had a temp and a runny nose, but was assured it was just "cutting teeth". Which, is normal when you're cutting teeth. So, Thursday Maysen woke up with a slight fever and runny nose, and he started coughing through the day. It's weird because kids can be sick and still act fine. Which, he was a tad "cuddly" here and there, but the rest of the time he was OK. So, Friday I go to work ... nothing wrong. Then I start getting a sore throat. By Friday night it was getting worse .. Saturday I wake up and decide we'd better just hang out and rest. By Saturday night, my chest was heavy with congestion and starting to "burn". I laid down to go to sleep, and I had this deep tickle in my chest, sat up and had to cough and OH MY LORD. I felt like a sawed off shotgun had just ripped open my thoracic cavity and someone was pouring bleach on it and my open throat. OH MAN! Rubbed Vick's all over like crazy and fell asleep shivering from the menthol.

So, I get up this morning (after maybe 4hrs of sleep) and the acid-cough is every 3min and my ears are starting to hurt. So, I decided I'd better go into Urgent Care to make sure I don't have strep throat or something that will manifest into "no good". So, we get there, and the doc listens and I'm wheezing like I've smoked 4 packs of cigs an hour. So, I have to have 2 albuterol breathing treatments via nebulizer. Dizziness has now set in from all the bronchodilation and I'm starting to breathe better. So, he says that I have SARS ... no, just kidding. I have viral bronchitis. So, I'm on mondo cough medicine and an inhaler. Is it bad that I've already had HALF the bottle of cough syrup with codeine?

But ... why is it that Jurny, 3, blows around with a runny nose and slight fever like it's nothing, gone in 1 day. Then Maysen gets it ... yea, he may be a tad slower but by the next day he's A-OK ... that runny nose means NOTHING to him. Me? Hell, I'm down and out as though someone with the biggest and worse pneumonia came and slept all over me, drooling down my throat. Nope! Maybe one slobbery kiss from my runny nose boy and this is day 3 that I'm down and off my ASS! Why are kid's germs so potent ... and how are they "that" immune to their potency?

So, yea, if I even think of beginning to laugh, I get that "Pstfff--" *hard hold of breath* trying to throw my body into that reject "No, you're NOT GOINGTO LAUGH" mode because knowing if I do, my chest will explode into a coughing frenzy, my head will rocket off my neck and burst into a million pieces. So you sort of just have to "blow through it" like you're in birthing classes, which I never took. Ok. And meanwhile, I've taken enough codeine to make my mouth so dry I feel like I might eat my tongue and swallow it whole ... if I only had some moisture. Lips all curled up in my gums .. I look like granny who has dentures and they're all dried and crusted up ... and the lips are clear above the gum lines all you see is "SKELETOR" teeth/gums. Yea, great. That'll kick your Saturday night romance RIGHT off ...

Ok. I am going to bed, and praying like hell that I feel better in the morning so I can MAYBE actually make something out of the last day of this long weekend. I wanna see the DaVinci Code.