Another successful holiday season down. It’s amazing how you run the marathon for a month, and before you know it, it’s all over! We had a great season this year. Christmas Eve I had a short run to the hospital so I could do my non-stress test and BP check. Once that was complete (and good) we went over to sis-in-law’s house for dinner and presents. This year we decided to just buy for the kids – and that was great. There’s so many of us now that we’d all be broke feeling like we had to buy for everyone. Aunt Danielle bought the boys suits of armor. The sword fight was fast and furious. They had a great time!

Robin, my other sister-in-law, is only a couple of days ahead of me in terms of gestation. Our original due dates are only a couple of days apart!

We went back home so I could rest for an hour then we were on our way to Nate’s mom’s house. My sister came with all of us – it’s so great that Nate’s family not only accepts me into their lives as their own, but they accept Jenn, too, just because she’s my sister. Maysen had a great time but the kids were about fried at this point. Believe it or not, Maysen had a harder time staying patient between present opening – so he started helping Grandma hand out presents and was actually more content being the Helper than he was at opening his presents!

Maysen was over-exhausted and cried during his whole bath. It was then my idea to bundle him up and go outside to see if we could see Santa up in the air. That was a soother-idea and he bought it. We came in and laid out the cookies and milk. There was a bit of an “incident” with MY Christmas cookies so I had to grab spares from Danielle’s house. Jenn, Maysen, and I baked the night prior and I was starting to hurt so got a bit side tracked. I forgot the baking soda and after 13 min of being in the oven, discovered nothing but a melted-dough mess on the sheet. (Unfortunately didn’t grab the camera for that … too much evidence).

I woke up earlier than everyone else Christmas morning. I was afraid Mase would get up and see the presents and I wanted to watch him see them, since this was the first year he really understood the meaning behind the “theory” of Santa. We finally went and woke him up – only to be greeted with “I don’t want to see my presents”. Oh really?! Well, after 30 seconds of thinking twice he was ready for action. The first thing he saw was his dump truck – that he had seen previously by accident and we convinced him it was Grandpa’s “tool” he had left behind a few weeks ago.

One of the gifts we’d been very excited to give to Maysen was his drivable race car. He has been driving the neighbor girls’ Barbie car, so it was time he got his own. We bought him a STOP sign – hey, we’re teaching him early. So we put that up before the garage door and I said “What’s this stop sign doing here? Who stops at stop signs?” … “CARS!” and then he opened the door and saw his car. He was so excited, it was priceless.

I can say that I’m more prepared for Griffin to show up any day now because I feel like now I can focus on him and not be distracted by other events going on (ie: holidays, etc). Today we got our tree taken down and the house back to “normal”. Thanks to Papa and Sherrill taking Mase to Portland today, Nathan and I – er … wait, I’m on bedrest (eh-hem) NATHAN got the whole house cleaned. I think we’re prepared. I have my doctor appointment tomorrow – and I have a hunch my BP will be up. So, again – if you don’t hear from me, you know that our Baby Griffin is here and I’ll post as soon as I’m allowed.

Please view my Flickr site for full Christmas 2007 pictures.

I passed!!

Seems my BP is cooperating these days ... so I passed my visit yesterday. I do have to go to the hospital on Monday to have a non-stress test but I don't have to see her or anything, just show up and do it. Merry Ho Ho Ho to me! But then I see her again Thursday next week. She made a comment how things are looking good - perhaps I could wait until 38wks. HUH!? Everytime I see her I feel like we're on the same page, but then I realize that she's on a different complete book everytime I see her. Very emotionally exhausting. God, speed this up!

My doctor requests my presence in her office at 8:00am tomorrow morning. Who knows, could have a baby tomorrow if my BP isn't cooperating. Such a strange feeling having so much ride on something so out of your control. If you don't hear from me, that's what happened - and Merry Christmas early!

NO BABY!!

So, amazingly enough, NO BABY today. Can you believe it!? Upon going into my doctor appointment (after getting mentally prepared, packed, and having the “brother” talk with Maysen) my BP was fine!! My doctor was off today (apparently upon giving me my ultimatum she forgot her day off was Wednesday), so I saw Dr Reilly. Nathan and I were both totally shocked as we were expecting to head to the hospital. So here I sit again – on the downhill grade of a roller coaster – a really unfriendly roller coaster. If any of you know someone who can reverse voodoo, let me know because I’m convinced I have a wicked spell cast on me! I am so emotionally exhausted right now, only because I’ve been all over the map for the last 3 weeks. Dr Reilly told me she’d talk to Dr Freidman today and have her call me because she assumed “.. she’ll just call you to schedule a delivery date.”

So far no call. My BPs have been stable all day and Christmas is right around the corner. So, “my” plan is to wait and see if she calls me tomorrow (which she’s off tomorrow, too). If she does not call me, I’ll ring her office Friday afternoon and we’ll discuss setting up a delivery/surgery date hopefully for December 26th. She told me she wouldn’t let me go past 37 weeks (which will be December 28th) and since her office is closed until December 26th once we pass Friday, that means no more office visits.. I’m convinced it’s the pure office visit that makes my BP rise. I’m just sorry to all my family and friends who, like me, are on pins and needles waiting because it has been a wild, wild ride so far. One that I’m ready for it to be over!! I’m not questioning things, as I’m sure this is all God’s will, I just wish the emotional crazy roller coaster is over soon.

Last night we put our ginger bread house together (or “candy house” as Maysen calls it) – one last thing I wanted to do as a 3-person family. It went really well, actually. In the kit you get from Costco they give you TONS of candy and pre-made icing (aka: glue). We were done with a bin still full of candy (thanks to this, one 3yr old wasn’t asleep until 11pm).

Last week Maysen had his first school Christmas Program. His part lasted 5min but it was perfect. I smiled so big the whole time and we were all so proud. The first song he was sort of Aw-Struck, but he warmed right up into the 2nd song with the help of Christmas bells to ring as hard as he could. It was so much fun – looking forward to many more of these!

*Sigh* So, believe me. This baby-thing is no sad attempt to keep some of you coming back (like a pathetic soap opera ploy of demonic presence in one of the main characters, or who's baby is so-and-so pregnant with). I truly hope that Griffin is born soon and will keep you posted as I get new info - because at this point it seems to be a 48hr by 48hr type of melodrama.

Hello?

So, where have I been? Well, I'll tell you. In the hospital! I have been there since Friday morning. I had my Dr appt on Friday and my BP was 180/110. Admittedly I was totally freaked out and full of anxiety, as I had already hospitalized me 3 times prior, and I was really frightened I'd end up back there. And I was, despite all the prayer to calm me down prior to my BP being checked.

I struggled all weekend with having to be there. It was so difficult. Some would think "TV, Books, relaxing in bed, what's the big deal?" Well, let me tell you. It was one of the hardest thing just making it through 3 days. Mainly because my BP was PERFECT upon admission and remained that way for the entire time, my non-stress tests were perfect (being done twice daily) and all my labs were fine. So it was hard on me only seeing my family for about an hour a day, the hour in which Maysen couldn't have cared any less because he was not happy being restrained in the room.

On Saturday, Dr Lee (who was covering for Dr Freidman) actually discharged me because I was so stable, but Dr F actually called him back to tell him not to let me go (GRRR). So, this morning when she walked in, I pleaded with her to let me go home as I'd be much less stressed at home. She finally caved this morning on one condition: That I come back in on Wednesday to have my BP rechecked and if it is as high as it was on Friday, then she's just delivering me that day. I will be 35w4d pregnant.

I struggle with the idea of having him early simply because I have major anxiety going into her office. At the same time I understand that just the "ability" of my BP getting that high is dangerous. And the reason my BP can get that high is related to pregnancy, so for the health of me - it's better to just not be pregnant at this time. I am praying that "if" I have to deliver on Wednesday then I'll be able to go to my hospital of choice - the one I was at for the last 3 days. The only thing, is that they have no NICU there if (God forbid) Griffin has problems. She had told me she wouldn't deliver at that hospital any sooner than 36wks (even though their policy allows delivery at 35wks) then she would make me delivery at SH hospital. It's OK - you should just see MCW hospital - all the rooms are private, whirlpool tubs, microwave/refridge, quiet. SH is busier, cramped, no guarantee of a private room, etc. So, it's in God's hands at this point as I realize I (in reality) am not controlling all of this.

Right now just for the next day or so I'm enjoying being home with Maysen. Tomorrow we're doing a gingerbread house and getting some quality time in. Nathan quit working officially for RealPro today; his last day was supposed to be Friday but in light of events, he just wrapped up today. So, he's working from home for W (his side contract job) until he starts working for his new company in Jan. So theoretically he's "off" until Jan 15th, working from home as little/much as he wants.

One blessing is that if this baby comes Wednesday then I will be home for Christmas. I was starting to get anxious that I wouldn't be home for Xmas due to a) recovering from CSection still or b) still being "Monitored" through xmas. I just hope and pray that Griffin is healthy, despite being a month early. Please keep us in your thoughts on Wednesday!!

Updates

So, yesterday I had my appt. Take one guess. Yep! Ended up in the hospital for a few hours to monitor BPs. My non-stress test was perfect, my labs were perfect, but because my BP had been 154/98 in the office I had to go. She told me to just hang in there until 36wks, which will be next Friday. At this point I can tell you we will for sure have Griffin in our arms between December 21-28 - which is in just a few weeks!! On one hand, I'd like to just have him on Dec 21 which will be when he turns 36wks; however then I'm likely not going to be home on Christmas. I hopefully can talk her into waiting until right after Christmas. I've been very excited for Xmas this year because Maysen is "getting it" and I really want to see his face on Christmas morning.

Nathan got a new job - I've been waiting to say something until he had his paperwork. His new boss is amazing and told Nate he would let him come in and work just one day in December so his health insurance started sooner. He has chosen this "one day" to be December 26th, so my ideal birthday for Griffin would be December 27th, just one day shy of 37wks.

I had my ultrasound today ... and get this. He is 34w3d old - and he weighs 7.5lbs already!! I couldn't believe it. His measurements are that of a 37w6d baby - 3wks ahead of where he is. So, we have a big boy here! I can't imagine going full term with him - he'd be 13lbs!! My next appt is Friday so I'm hoping to know more then as far as when we could be scheduling this surgery.

Yes; so Nathan got a new job. He wasn't completing what he had hoped at his job he's had since July. He accepted a position as a more senior software engineer at a more established company in Eugene and felt it would be a better career move for him. I agree. Although he hated leaving a job he'd only been in for 6mo, he felt it was important to our family and I agree. His last day at his current job will be December 21 (if we don't have a baby on or before that day) and his new job is allowing him time off to be with the family and he starts January 15th. That means Nathan will be home for 3.5 weeks with us. Thank the Lord how that worked out!

We moved our office out of the spare room to accommodate the nursery. We now just work on our laptops if needed, and our scanner has yet to be hooked up so I can't post the CUTEST ultrasound picture. Fin's head down, and his head is in a pocket where his hair is sticking straight down. He's got a baby mohawk already! So cute!

I also changed the look of Fin's site ... check it out if you have a free moment.

On a last note, tomorrow is Maysen's first school Christmas Program. Mase has been getting treats because he is one of the only ones who really belts it out on stage. It's neat hearing him sing songs I remember singing in school. Will be posting video on it after the program tomorrow.

What I hear right now: "Come on Baby Brother, lets play trains ... OK! Lets go. Lets fix the tracks because it's broken. That's fun brother ... CHOOOO!" This is going to be fun!

Fin's nursery and recipe

I didn't update about my doctor appointment on Friday. I (for once) didn't get admitted on Friday. I relaxed in my recliner during my non-stress test and my BP came down to 142/70 which allowed me to come home. No protein in my urine - thanks to bed rest. She confirmed she is going to deliver Griffin at 36-37wks, which is in about 2 weeks. I am hoping to stay at home and out of the hospital until she decides to deliver, but it'll probably be an appointment-by-appointment thing, which my next one is Tuesday. One thing's for sure - Griffin will be here either right before or right after Christmas. Our little Christmas Bee!

This weekend was spent going 100mph again (Nate, not me. I watched - which is just as exhausting!) Knowing that we could have a baby in a matter of days depending on how things go put us in gear to get Griffin's nursery done. We've been putting it off and I'm such a "preparer" that I like things done and in order (some call it OCD).

Nate let me sleep in today while he and Maysen made French Toast. We got started on this nursery yesterday. Nate put all the pieces together and Maysen conquered his fear of the drill. Such a proud look when he said, "Dad and Maysen fixed this!" and pointed at the dresser. I love that!

As you can tell, we've chosen a firetruck theme, which so far has been fun. What I'm excited the most to try is the video monitor that is perched above the crib. It's actually pretty cool!

Maysen has new light on this Griffin business. He's realizing that there is a baby coming and it wasn't until we got out the baby car seat that he wanted to revert to the baby. "I'm baby Maysen!" He's even climbed up into the crib on occasion. This could be interesting, as he's insisting already that we move his bed into Griffin's room. This is going to be fun, I think.

I apologize for not putting this up sooner, but I've had a couple of people request the recipe for the caramel I made, so here it is:

1/2c butter
1c brown sugar
1/2c whipping cream
1 tsp vanilla

1. Cook butter and brown sugar in a heavy saucepan over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until sugar melts.
2. Stir in whipping cream; Bring to a boil, stirring occasionally. Let boil approx 30 seconds.
3. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla; Allow to cool slightly.
4. Serve over ice cream or with fruit, such as apple slices. Or pour into jars for gifts. Makes about 2 cups.

Ho Ho Ho

Last week before all this bedrest stuff started, I made homemade caramel to give to neighbors, teachers, friends. It turned out really well, and was extremely simple. Finished off with wire bows and some tags, they're ready to go! Let me know if you want the 4 ingredient recipe.

*sigh*

Well, I think I'm running a competition for how many times I can be hospitalized prior to delivery. Yesterday I had my appointment/recheck. I was anxious to talk to her about my prior hospitalization (because I saw the on-call Dr) but when I checked in, she was at the hospital and there would be a delay. "Ok," I thought, "that'll give me a chance to relax before she comes." Well. They take me back and hook me up to the monitor. No baby heartbeat. Then we'd hear it, but he'd move. We did this for 20min. They like about a 20min record of the heartbeat to watch for irregularities, but we weren't even getting 20 SECONDS on the monitor. The nurse looks at me and says "Well, we might have to send you to the hospital for monitoring if this keeps up." *GULP*. Just then another doctor walks in, says she'll be talking with me since Dr F was at the hospital and asks the nurse if she's taken my BP. Well, she hasn't and now I can feel it out the roof in light of all that's going on at this point. Sure enough! 162/94 (for those that don't know, normal BP is 120/80) That mixed with inability to keep him on the monitor landed me BACK in the hospital last night. She also told me that my protein/urine came back from last week at 298, which is diagnosable as mild pre-eclampsia.

I got there, and my BP did come down a bit, but not as much as it had on Friday. It was running about 140/78 on average. They drew stat labs, which all came back OK - even better than last week, which is good. They released me after about 3hrs, but the nurse did "advise" me to pack a bag because I can "skate by for now" but will eventually be kept permanently until delivery. Dr Franz, who was covering, said that they would probably delivery me at 37wks, which is the week of Christmas. Is it ok that I'm starting to sort of panic??

Many have asked how strict and complete bedrest is going with Maysen. I have a great family!! My sister-in-law is picking up/dropping off Maysen at school on Wed, Thurs, Fri mornings. I called the school and they're letting him stay for lunches so he'll be gone from 8:15-12:00 and I won't have to make lunch. Then the school called and offered to let me bring him on Monday mornings, too. So, I have all morning alone and free 4 days a week except for Tuesdays. He does pretty good at coloring and watching cartoons (which I hate all day), but now that he'll be going to school 4 mornings a week, that will get him out of the house and doing stuff rather than sitting at home.

On a humorous note, I'm teaching Nate how to take blood pressure. I know, crazy. But it's hard for me to do it manually. Last night he did rather well, but kept forgetting to let out the air, so my arm is blue and he just starts walking off stating what it is, and I'm like "Uhhh..." Then he lets the air out too fast and he's all "Oh! Ohhh!!" :-) Funny Mr Nurse.

Pregnancy-Induced Hypertension

This is one of the pictures we got while on the Polar Express with Maysen. It was magical to see his eyes light up. He loved it!!
I had my OB appointment on Friday. I had to see the on-call doctor this time due to my OB doc being in NY for a conference. I LOVED Dr R, the on-call doc. She was great. They hooked me up to the non-stress test machine and she came in to look at it. Of course everything was fine, but again my BP was really high. So she took me back to the room to recheck it. No change. So she made me lay down with "O" magazine from her office. 10min went by and here she comes again. Sure enough - still no change in my blood pressure. So I had to be admitted to the hospital. I understand the legality. If I have a 170/100 BP written in the books that didn't resolve, then they can't legally let me just go home. So, to the hospital I went. Within an hour of being there, it was down to 112/60 and stayed there for the next few hours I was there. Luckily after lunch since my BP was stable I got to go home with strict orders for bed rest. Dr R was very clear that this wasn't an option and "..if that means you have take-out every damn night, no laundry gets done, your house is a wreck, you feed your 3yr old Popsicles all day ... then that's what it means!" So ... I'm home and trying to stay still. The protein in my urine was down drastically on Friday so I'm waiting to see today if it's gone. I have a feeling that it was so elevated last week due to dehydration from having the flu. We'll see.

Here's my frustration: It's documented that at home resting my BP is fine - perfect if I stay "being good". It's when I get up, hustle around, go nuts, etc that it spikes. They are having me come to the office twice a week to check up on my blood pressure and make sure there are no ill effects .... BUT the only reason it's high when I get there is because I've not been resting (like my orders) when I have to go twice a week. And this isn't just a 20min ordeal. I have to get ready, I have to M ready, drive 30min to the babysitters, drive to their office - all on a strict time schedule, get there only to hike it across the office to the bathroom to leave my sample - then they hike me up on the table to strap the cuff on my arm. Frustrating. So they want me to stay home and rest so my BP stays down, yet they want to see me twice a week to check on my high BP that's only high because they make me go in there. So, I'm not sure what to do ... but I feel like I should say something. My labs are stable ... my BP is stable at home resting ... my non-stress tests have all been fine ... so why am I having this BP spikes twice a week because they make me go in there? Wouldn't it be healthier to keep me resting at home? So .. this is a question I will pose today when I see my doctor.

Yesterday Nate got the spare room/office all cleaned out and put in the garage. The carpets are going to be cleaned this week, so this coming weekend we'll (Nate) be putting the nursery together. Need to get that all ready to go. I have to tell you how amazingly fast this pregnancy has gone. I can't believe that in about 1mo I will have another son. At times I sit here sad because my life with only Maysen is going to change - and I feel sad for that. But after reading EJ's site, it reminds me that my heart will only explode with love for both my boys!